Love, Unconditionally

February may be the month of love, but as we celebrate Valentine's Day in all of its Hallmark-generated glory, we usually refer exclusively to the kind of love that, admit it or not, is conditional on a variety of factors, including compatibility, chemistry, physical attraction and more. 

But what about the concept of unconditional love - a love that truly knows no bounds, is wholly unfettered by whether or not the object of your affection behaves or looks a way that you perceive is lovable – naughty or nice, kind or stingy, sweet or mean, even whether affectionate or violent? Can such an extraordinary degree of love exist here on earth, with all of our worldly limitations? 

Indeed, it does... and by now, you've surely guessed where (and only where, we think): The love a parent feels for a child defines what it means to love unconditionally as a human. And as a parent, it is our foremost charge – and honor– to not only convince our children that, no matter what they do, we will still love them just as much, but also, to teach them what it means to love unconditionally by leading through example. After all, one day, there will be no greater joy in this world than watching our children showering their own progeny with the kind of love that can only be learned through experience. 

Loving your child without condition is, luckily, an instinct with which most every parent is graced. However, the ability to exhibit affection as such is, for some, a skill that must be honed and practiced, although never perfected. Especially during the more challenging stages of child rearing – during toddler and teenage stages, the ability to display affection unconditionally becomes especially challenging for anyone!

If there’s one part of parenting you’d really like to get right, learning how to show your child that your love is unconditional is the absolute best place to start.

When it comes to saying “I love you,” ensure that these most invaluable words aren’t dependent on your child’s behavior or performance. In fact, remember to say “I love you” not only when your child does or says something that you find favorable, but also when their behavior is anything but desirable. Remember that you will not be spoiling your child into the belief that she can get away with anything unscathed, because you’ll be following through with appropriate discipline – which should never, ever include withholding love. When your child becomes secure in the fact that your love for him truly has no limits, he also learns that mistakes are allowed, so that he can, in turn, learn from them, as well.